To Walk Without Shape or Sound
That I cling to this cold sleep,
show little effort to be removed . . .
In nightmares of symbols grey and mortal,
fears translate all my hope
into an impatient temper, and I stand,
arms folded, with threatening glances
turned toward the window.
That I will not move from this unhappy
bondage, give the world the wave it deserves and
rejoice, full force in my non-belonging . . .
That I lay with false sorrow, my numbing wounds
displayed like so many movies, consuming
all thought and vision . . .
Drowning in unutterable loneliness, I
cannot pray this bad taste off my tongue,
cannot claim my home inside the lightning jaws.
I have seen the light abandoned for the hangnail’s
torment. I have seen this darkness, dug my head deep
in its flaming mud.
But this is nowhere:
There is only
the circle, the spiral journey
only to be like the animals and angels,
to the weather’s foothold.
Copyright © 1997 by Allison Grayhurst
First published in “Poetry Nottingham International”, 1996
You can listen to the poem by clicking below:
“Allison Grayhurst intertwines a potent spirituality throughout her work so that each poem is not simply a statement or observation, but a revelation that demands the reader’s personal involvement. Grayhurst’s poetic genius is profound and evident. Her voice is uniquely authentic, undeniable in its dignified vulnerability as it is in its significance,” Kyp Harness, singer/songwriter, author.
“Allison Grayhurst’s poems are like cathedrals witnessing and articulating in unflinching graphic detail the gritty angst and grief of life, while taking it to rare clarity, calm and comfort. Grayhurst’s work is haunting, majestic and cleansing, often leaving one breathless in the wake of its intelligence, hope, faith and love amidst the muck of life. Many of Allison Grayhurst’s poems are simply masterpieces. Grayhurst’s poetry is a lighthouse of intelligent honour… indeed, intelligence rips through her work like white water,” Taylor Jane Green, Registered Spiritual Psychotherapist and author.